Just an update

JerkBoy and I have been having a bit of an odd relationship lately we go from being just a little too close to arguing.

Yep it's like we pass the friendship line, we both realise and then we're both not very nice to each other. I hate bickering with him but it seems to be happening more and more often.

I get really funny about this girl who contacts him alllll the time, she's got a boyfriend and he loves that she's contacting him and he eggs her on and I hate it. I can't really judge because it reminds me of the Flatmate days. Jerkboy thinks I'm jealous but truth is I just worry that in the end he'll be the one hurt.

Oh and my boss has handed in his notice - my boss who I got on so well with also tried to screw me over - looooonnnggg story but the guy who's taken his place seems to be a bit more together. My jobs really up in the air at the moment.

In other news I've had a couple of emails from a guy on a dating site. It's early days but he seems normal which beats others I've met on the dating site although could be wrong.

Oh and Teddy hasn't sent me an email in about 5 days so that's probably a good thing I think.

He has a hold on me!

This morning I logged on to find an email from Teddy.

Will he ever stop having the hold on me that he has? Will I ever let go?

I hate the hold he has on me, but at the same time I love the hold he has on me!

I'm sure!

It's all slowly becoming a lot more clear. I'm pretty certain New Guy is interested in me in someway, the drunken love text kind of tells me that anyway but it's all become clear. He wasn't over his ex and as a result kept me at a distance, in keeping me at a distance he pushed me away and to be honest I've liked being away.

Apart from the fact a few weeks ago his ex told him she was seeing someone else and as a result the contact with me has upped somewhat, well a lot actually and it was already daily contact, now it's like a zillion times a day. Part of me likes it, part of me finds it weird, part of me feels for him because I've been there, part of me questions if it's rebound, part of me knows it can't just be rebound.

So what does this all mean... Well unfortunately, or fortunately it doesn't mean anything because regardless of whatever New Guys confusion is. I am certain about one thing and that's we're just friends and that's all I want to be with him.