Ignorance is bliss

So, why am I not happy?

I can't believe that I have seen Climber Dude every night since our intense conversation. I saw him Monday night at the pub, I saw him Tuesday night and then last night I go round a friends house to catch up with them, and next thing I know they say to me "We've invited Climber Dude too, seeing as you to have been getting on lately knew you wouldn't mind *wink"

WHAT THE CRAP.

It was actually ok last night I managed to have conversation with him as if nothing had happened. He doesn't go on his skiing trip until Monday, but thankfully I don't "think" I'll see him before now. I say "think" because seriously I didn't "think" he'd be there last night and he was.

I keep finding myself wanting to pick up my phone and text him (I didn't even text him that much to start with), I keep saying to myself "I'll tell Climber Dude that when I next see him", I find myself replaying conversations we've had in my head, and I just am finding it all a bit strange. I really never thought I'd miss him this much. However, it is that time of the month so I'm sure that influences everything more. Next week when my cycle is over for a month and when he's away I'm sure my head will stop being so darn fuzzy.

In other news: I've been emailing Teddy, trying to make sure I stay in constant touch with him, at this moment in time I don't think I could cope if we lost touch, but I know what Teddy's life he's in and out of my life like the bloody yokeycokey.

I have another operation next week too. I'm fed up of my body I just want it to work properly. I'll only be off work for 2 days this time so I wont be wollowing in a bordom pity, but if this op doesn't work I may have to have another one and that one will mean I'm laid up for some time. It's weird having to face it without Climber Dude, last time he visited me loads, this time he'll be away and I'll be alone. I have asked Jerk Boy to visit me and he said he would but I don't want to become to relient on Jerk Boy, it's what I do and I need to stop doing it.

Talk about screwed up!