My Rock.
I've been at work for over an hour and how much work have I done? ZILCH.
So, good friend (that I spoke about in my plans who's guy has been cheating on her) I really need a name for good friend. I am going to call her Rocky, because she is my Rock. She's one of those friends who isn't scared to tell you how it is, when you're doing the wrong thing. She corrects me when I get too wild and tells me to calm down. She really is my Rock.
Anyhow, I've just got off the phone to her, we've chatted every day this week because she's so messed up about what's happened with her man. Tell you what, hwen you're rock becomes messed up it's really quite scary. I want to be her rock and help her out in the same way she keeps me grounded but I just feel inadequate.
She knows nothing about the Flatmate situation. I haven't told her because I know she'd tell me off big time over it all. So I figured not telling her was wiser however, tonight I have to go round her place, listen to her trying to figure out whther to take this guy back or not and by the way this guy is REALLY fighting for her big time, he's been to talk to her brother and her dad lives in a different country yet he's booked a flight to go and speak to her dad to prove how genuinely sorry he is. She wont talk to him at the moment apart from on the phone but he is fighting for her big time.
The thing is I think she deserves so much better but you do don't you? wehn you care about someone? and they've been a rock to you! However I need my opinion to not influence her decision because what if my opinion makes her miss the opportunity to have the love of her life.
He's always thought he'd marry her and she always thought she'd marry him so it's all a big mess and he'd even told this girl he slept with that he was going to marry Rocky.
The thing is I have to go and be the sympathetic ear in the knowledge that I've been that other girl, I've been that manipulating girl, the girl that enjoyed the power she had when she caused a guy that is already taken to cheat on his girlfriend. I've been that girl, I've been that same girl who is causing my Rock so much pain. And I am really beginning to hate myself right now.
posted by Gretta James at 2:12 AM
4 Comments:
I don't believe that "the other woman" should take all the blame (unless she is a good friend of the wronged person). It's not her relationship. She's not the one who cheated on her fiance. You can't force someone to cheat. If someone cheats, then that probably means that something isn't right in the relationship, anyway.
I don't think you should feel guilty at all. This is not your fault!
It wasn't all your fault, and at the very least you recognize that it wasn't right. Be there for the Rock, just as you would want her to be there for you.
+1 to Scotty's comment.
It's time to return the favor.
Hey babe, ever thought you're her rock?
Sounds to me like you're being an awesome friend right now.Listening and being there is all you can do. She doesn't need your opinion, she needs your support in whatever decision she makes.
And whatever happened with Flatmate was not your fault. HE made the choice, not you.
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