Bored (of) games.

Last night was great. It was a friend's birthday and lots of people I hadn't seen in ages were there. Someone I hadn't seen in about a year started talking to me, a year ago I had orginally explained to him the situation between myself and Jerk boy, he seemed to realise by what I was saying that things hadn't changed a whole lot.

As I was explaining the situation quietly, so none of my everyday friends overheard (they all think I stopped liking Jerk boy months and months ago and think that I am the biggest fool for ever getting sucked in by his charm) I tried to tell him how I didn't have feelings for Jerk boy anymore, but he didn't believe me pointed out the precise reasons why he didn't believe me that he got from what I had told him. His argument was convincing and now I realise that I probably do still have feelings for Jerk boy. How I wish I didn't but maybe I do, I am so confused.

Anyway, the guy I was chatting to said he was going to email me to get more information out of me and to help me out a bit. I guess it was good to talk to someone who doesn't label me a fool for falling for Jerk guy in the first place. He also said that he'd point out the way Jerk boy plays mind games with me and the right things for me to do when he does play them because apparently I have been reacting in the exact way Jerk boy wants me to.

The worst part about all this, is I actually had convinced myself that I was heading in the right direction - the way to get over him, but by the sounds of things I have been digging the hole deeper at times without even realising it. Now I feel like I am at stage one again. I thought the games had stopped but they haven't it's just a different style of game we've started playing. One that I am unsure of the rules it seems. At least this guy is going to try and explain them to me, even if I don't win, it should mean that I don't lose quite so badly.