It hurts

I am so used to guys letting me down to get me to open up and unzip my hurting thoughts seems to be tough feat for the male of the species.

I have online friend. YOu may remember I mentioned him previously a guy called Biker. Although Biker and I aren't in a relationship we've continued chatting. He's single, I'm single and we have this rule that we'll jsut chat to stop the loneliness until one or the other meets someone or gets off their ass and visits.

So, yesterday Biker was online and he was asking me about my dad but I just didn't want to talk to him about my dad. I was at work and at risk of tears if the conversation got deep plus I didn't want to talk about it I wanted him to take my mind off it. When I didn't talk about it he kind of finished the conversation and went to bed. This hurt. I felt rejected because I wouldn't open up.

Today he came online and said he was talking to another friend because she was down and needs a job. I suddenly realised he feels needed when people open up and share with him and I couldn't.